Saturday, January 4, 2014

16 Weeks Pregnant Thoughts


I have grown. Proof? 13 weeks.

I'm going to admit. The growing is hard. I have always taken care of my body, obsessed and worried about it at times, perhaps. I've noticed minuscule weight changes and shifted eating habits and exercise to accommodate. I have spent so much mental energy and time keeping myself healthy.

This weight change hasn't been miniscule. I am not one of those women who can hide her first growing baby until halfway through. I've put on 11 pounds in 16 weeks. Most of my pants can no longer be buttoned around my bump. I'll admit it; it's hard to watch it happen. It's normal, it's expected, it's healthy, but it's hard. I watch my growing belly, knowing it's never going to be the same, knowing I may develop the craggy lines of stretch marks, knowing my belly button will one day look unrecognizable. My life is changing, and it's starting here, right at the centre of me.

But, there's an upside to the bump. An amazing, kind of mind-blowing upside that everyone knows but no one really elaborates on much. Every so often, somewhere deep in my stomach, I feel an odd kind of shift I've never felt before, like something is pressing up against the inside of my skin. It's a reminder, my little boy or girl affirming to me that this is something I want, something I prayed for, something I can't wait to come to fruition. Losing my baby-less body is scary, but when he or she gives me a little poke, I know it's a sacrifice I won't regret.

12 comments:

  1. I had a friend who didnt look pregnant at all until she was 5-6 months and then she finally ballooned. She said she actually hated it because she felt pretty crappy but didnt have the excuse of looking pregnant (ie, no seat on streetcar, no one helping her out when carrying heavy things). However her body went back pretty well because she kept active and tried to keep eating well. Everyone is different in how their body responds, but try and stay healthy and you will have an easier time bouncing back!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think you look great! You were so petite pre-pregnancy that I'm not surprised at all that it's already changing your body. I, too, would have a hard time with gaining weight. Obviously it's going to happen, but I feel like women are conditioned to watch the scale and watch what we eat. I imagine it would be hard to see the scale numbers going up, but you're growing a human in there! Keep up the good work :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. N_StyleingwithChildrenJanuary 4, 2014 at 3:52 PM

    If you were careful about your weight before baby, you will return back to your normal self pretty quickly. Those healthy eating/exercise habits won't disappear :) I had my 2nd baby 5.5 month ago and am 5lbs shy of my starting out weight. And even that is because I"m lazy. Putting my mind to loosing the last 5 over the next few months :)


    PS. no one discusses this as much as weight, but my posture suffers the most with each pregnancy/baby carrying. I worry more about posture than weight. Especially this 2nd time around my baby boy is on the heavy side and carrying him around has done a number on my back. But, again, nothing that can't be corrected if you put your mind to it.


    Congrats!

    ReplyDelete
  4. It is hard, during and after. Even now, I'm pretty much back to my normal shape, but I have scars and marks from pregnancy still, and I probably always will. However, I've found that after having a baby, I'm much more confident and comfortable in my own body. This is the only one you've got, right?

    Also, I second the comment about back pain - oooof. The worst.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hear that's very common for a first pregnancy! I can still hide it pretty easily, and, unfortunately, since it will be winter for a good chunk of the time that my stomach is growing, I'll probably be covered in layers of coats and scarves enough that I won't get any seat on the subway until spring... Oh well!


    Everything I read tells me I shouldn't have a problem bouncing back to my old self, so I'm not really worried about it, but it's still an odd mental adjustment to put on weight and actually welcome it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I've heard that how much you show has everything to do with the length of your torso. I'm not sure how true that is... It is a difficult mental adjustment, but reminding myself that it is normal - and a good thing! - certainly helps!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I've heard so many stories like yours of women returning to their pre-baby weight fairly quickly and it's definitely encouraging! Posture - you're right, no one talks about that!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm a little nervous about those scars and marks. I'm hoping I'll be able to fall in love with them, knowing what they mean. Because yes! This is the only body I've got!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh my goodness look at you - you are just too darn cute! As long as you keep up with your healthy lifestyle, while accommodating the growing needs of the little one, you'll be just fine! Pregnancy has always fascinated me... I mean, you are growing a human, and that is beautiful and crazy all at the same time!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am kind of afraid I will be like your friend. I am 16 weeks pregnant with my first and I haven't gained any weight and unless I wear a very tight shirt, nobody can tell. I do stay active and eat a ton, I guess I will be one of those late bloomers.

    ReplyDelete